Monday, May 07, 2007

Coke Nail


sweet mya has suggested fingernails.

i have researched the phenomenon of the long pinky nail with no credible results - just a lot of forums and message boards with subject lines like, "what's up with the long pinky nail? LOL!"

apparently, it is more common among asian men. sometimes, it is a sign of wealth. more often, it seems to be used for very practical purposes - picking the nose, cleaning the ears, and snorting coke on the go. this last use was most commonly suggested among the blogs i read - it is referred to as the "coke nail."

but why stop at cocaine? what if we all grew our pinky nails really long and started using them as official measuring units? would you like some coffee? sugar? how many coke nails? it would save clean up while baking cookies if we only needed to add two coke nails of vanilla extract instead of messing with the little metal spoons.

once this custom is firmly embedded into our culture, the coke nail will invade our vernacular, and "coke nail" will replace words like "smidge" and "dash." upon breakups, one lover will say to the other, "don't you love me anymore? not even a coke nail?"

if this post is really bad, i apologize. i have been up since four; i didn't sleep a coke nail.

115 comments:

Dirty Asiatic said...

this post is hilarious!!!! and not a coke nail bad! :)

KT said...

I'm going to learn how to cook just so I can write a cookbook where everything is measured in coke nails.

Baby said...

thanks, mya!

katie, we can cook together when we learn to play bridge. then we can rewrite mary poppins as an urban slang musical. "just a coke nail of sugar helps the medicine go down..."

Kara Beara said...

I'm in awe of the coke nail. We need to get this high jinks club rolling. There should be some sort of initiation, funny, slightly embarrassing. Now that I'm back, I'll be thinking.

danielle said...

I was watching TV last night and saw someone with a long fingernail and said "Damn that's a coke nail."

Oh wait, now that I think about it, it was a dream and someone had a coke nail and then I did some coke. It was weird.

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